I'm alright.

I promise.

You came back. I always had a feeling you would. It places a smile in my heart, upon my face. It makes my nose tingle when you touch it. In the dark with the stars and the thickness of the air. You wanted to; you told me. It would have complicated things, and I know that. It was enough just to tell you in a truthful manner and set things straight. It has suddenly become apparent to me to what degree this situation intrigues me. This position that I've been put in is principal to me.

All I ever wanted was to stand by you; to hold my ground next to your warm, tall frame. My heart hammers so swiftly next to your steadily beating one. This feeling is so strange. I will not in any way try to comprehend what, why, or even how. Be it different than anything in the world, and so strong. I have faith that it could fill the hearts of so many people. Give them hope for another tomorrow. How amazing it has become so meaningful to my soul and my prosperity. 

I screamed. In a field. My sheer joy overflowed through my lungs and vocalic grooves. It gives me chills imagining those first nights, realizing how incredibly indescribable they have emerged as. I am elated with the thought that everything is settled, and how the encumbrance is lifted. I think you might truly understand me. I know I understand you; you told me.

I know you have to go. I understand it. It might be for the best, but all I want for you is your happiness and your fulfillment. Just know, my dear that I'm here to stay. 

The room is spinning around with nowhere for me to turn. I could choose the lesser of two evils, but I'm not sure which one would bring me less pain. I don't think you understand the concept here. I need you. I need you like the ground needs the summer rain. Like an addict's veins need the needle. I'm having withdrawals. I'm going crazy. My head doesn't work right. I can't think straight. I'm trying so desperately to keep my head above water; to stay afloat. I'm like a duck in a hurricane. My little webbed feet are reeling over and over again in the same pattern, and yet... it does not a bit of good. Not at all. I'm drowning. I'm slowly sinking. I need you to tell me where to go. This no longer rests in my hands. I need to give it up, but sacrifice is so much harder when it comes to this.

I know I haven't blogged in awhile, but it seems as if my thoughts have been straight, and I don't blog unless something is troubling me. I'm not a happy blogger... anyway... I'm back. Probably for awhile.